A baby and a box of animal crackers...

Happy with his crackers...

Daddy? Will you open this one?

Who knows what drives the mind of a 14-month-old? Could be instinct or actual need, desire to emulate... but in this case, I think it was merely "because I can."

I had bought a box of animal crackers at Sam's - you know the huge supply, with the individual bags? A busy mom's dream, right? And I placed them on the bottom shelf of the pantry. I guess at that point in my experience I was yet underestimating Draes's LOVE for food, especially of the "carb kind."

As soon as he discovered what they were, AND that he could get them all by himself, my dream became one of those annoying loops you can't escape. Draes would bring me a bag and say "euh?" (his sweet version of please). But sweet went out the window when, once the bag was opened, he would run to the pantry for another. And if you were a dope and tried to explain to him that he already had an opened bag, his heart broke in front of you and he sobbed as he tried to make clear his request. OBVIOUSLY, you hadn't understood him correctly.

Boy I'm glad that box is now empty! But the experience left me with a spiritual insight, especially in this time of our country's financial struggle. How often do I come to God with my "bag of animal crackers" begging Him to give me what I ask? And, when He does provide, do I show my gratitude and find joy in what He's given me? Or do I sprint back to the "pantry" and fretfully bring Him my next "need," weeping hysterically if/when He doesn't immediately comply?

I've begun to ask myself that question too... what is "need"? Two weeks ago there was a fire in the field very near our house. The police evacuated the subdivision behind us; so, as my infant lay sleeping, I threw together a bag of necessities just in case the wind continued to shift and they couldn't control blaze. It was sobering as I watched the fire and saw families standing, embracing one another outside their homes. If we were to lose our house, what would we NEED? What holds greatest importance? 

What about the families in Galveston and other parts of Texas who have lost everything? What is "need" to them? Are they grieving because they can't afford that new car, or have to cut their grocery budget? Or are they simply glad to be alive and hoping they have enough food and clothing to cover their families?

I'm not making any statements, just asking lots of questions, and allowing my perspective to change... funny isn't it? What you can learn from a baby and a box of animal crackers?

Some new pics...

See that look of pride! :) He climbs on whatever he can.  We took the bottom rung off the ladder after this. Skull fracture? None for me, thanks! BOY is he mad at us!

Draes brought me his brother's shirt, which he wanted to put on. Then he brought his own pj pants, but he already had shorts on, so we put them on his head. It was reminiscent of Jar Jar Binks... only cuter :)

Such a great Dad! 

Apologies...

I apologize it's been a little while since I've posted. I like to include pics of the boys (cuz I know most of my readers are most interested in those ;), and I seem to have put my cord in a "safe place.

So, I'll just let you know the latest and get to the pics as soon as I find it.

Hmmm... youngest first - at his last visit, Draes was in the 60% for his weight and 30% for his height. I think he's just taking a breather from being so huge when he was born. His doctor assures me a more accurate assessment of his final size will be around 2 years. I'm not worried. He eats like a tank... and pretty much "drives" like one too. His latest adventure is to climb on everything he can reach. I turned around yesterday to see him STANDING on the rocking horse. Of course he just smiles. He's decided he wants to walk down the stairs like his brother, and fights me when I force him onto his stomach. I'm sure it seems like I'm holding him back, but catching your son as he ROLLS and BOUNCES down 15 feet is neither easy nor amusing. Still, with all that and the impending emergency room visits, he's such an easy boy. Everyone is his buddy - he slaps them on the knee and laughs like they've told a joke! And no matter what the rest of us are doing, he'll often be found occupying himself elsewhere with whatever interests him.

Daxton is quite ready to be 5. He's a great help with Draes, even rushing to the stairs to model for him how to "go down like this." And I think we're starting to grow bored of knocking brother down just because we're stronger. Now most days are spent with Dax acting out his antics and Draes LAUGHING in hysterics. Drae loves to laugh; Dax loves an audience. It works out QUITE well :) Dax is also really into counting lately - a cue to mom to start some math work, probably... gotta get on that. He'll combine numbers and want to know how to say 123,456,789. He's always either impressed or skeptical that I'm pulling his leg. And his sincerity never fails. We were talking one night about having God in our lives. I was explaining some to him, but we really want him to understand it's more than just a prayer, so I was probably too adult in my verbage. Anyway, I told him if we believe in Jesus we can pray and tell God we believe and want him in our lives. He said a little prayer and then turned to me, "Mom, it's not working." I laughed, of course. It's kind of nice to never wonder where you stand. So, we know we don't quite grasp all that yet. Dax's most recent highlight was his "Daddy day" with Dusty. They left the house at 10 am and didn't return until almost 7 pm. If you wanna read about that - check out Dusty's blog www.imconnected.blogspot.com.

Speaking of Dusty. He's up to lots and lots - we launched a community outreach this week: www.ivebeenserved.com and next week are our Creative Camps - some free creative instruction we're providing for people in the community. So he's exceptionally busy being husband, daddy, pastor, mentor, friend, evangelist, real estate agent, videographer and editor, etc. :)

Me? I just try to keep up with them and pace myself. Sounds like we're having another boy, so I'm gearing up for more of the same LOL! I actually attend an orientation tomorrow in order to be placed on the rotation for substitute teaching. It should be a great connection within the community.

Ok, well, I'm gonna run see if I can find that camera cord somewhere! Hope you are doing well and have a beautiful week :)

Lately...

Ahhhh me... the boys are in bed and Dusty's upstairs watching a he-flick with his buddy Jordan so I'm sneaking a few moments to update y'all on the family.

Lately, Dusty has been showing houses (after paying a joyous mountain of real estate dues and insurance fees) and meeting city leaders. I haven't seen him this dressed up, this OFTEN in a long time :) New things excite him, so he's having lots of fun. He continues to meet people, blog, and design websites and media for upcoming events. As usual, he tends to excel at whatever he touches. My own proverbial Midas. :)

Lately, Daxton has been grounded from video games. And I note this SIMPLY because he asks EVERY DAY what remains of his sentence. It's becoming apparent we must move to a different consequence for our "attitude infractions." Between offenses, however, he's a lot of fun, a great helper - we have daily chores now - and he loves his brother, when he's not strong-arming him, just because.

Lately, Draes... well, scares me. He RUNS to everything, fears NOTHING, except maybe Daxton :). LOL His body's like a little, human segway. Buddha belly leans forward, forward we go. Buddha belly straightens up, we stop. Buddha belly leans back (or too far forward), we fall down. I laugh a lot. He's a toughy, that one. He face plants, bangs his head and trips over whatever's on the floor that he wasn't looking for so didn't step over, but he rarely cries. No, crying is reserved for the realization that Mommy has no more ice cream to share. Then we shriek in utter disdain and flail across the room into the pantry to pout. Bystanders think he's hurt and rush to his aid. Mom just laughs - I wish I looked cute doing that.

But lately, mom? Well, I'm just "WAY BIGGER" than I ought to be. My buddha belly is NOT cute, nor are the buddha body parts which have expanded to offset its gravity. POO! I know, "you're pregnant!" But that is no excuse for THIS - sorry. Oh well, I went for a walk tonight... For those who've been wondering, we might know what the baby "is" as early as next week. My fun comes in learning with the boys. Dax reads more each day and Drae's at that GREAT age where EVERYTHING is a new adventure. It's nice having Dusty around more. It's fun to share with him in those "look at that!" moments. I love connecting with new people around here and watching what God is doing. 

So that's what we're up to! What are you doing lately?...

Freedom

Celebrating freedom is an interesting thing. I think, like so many holidays in America, we can get more caught in the traditions than the meaning. It's important to reflect upon our reasons for doing what we do. 

I did that for me this year, but didn't do a great job with my son. (I'll talk to him about it tomorrow I PROMISE. And he'll probably give me that funny look, but better late than never.) We had a great get together at our neighbors' house - about 35 people! And our fireworks display included something tres unique (that's my contribution from 4 years of French in HS - see Dad, I DO use it :)) - we got to see someone blow up an airbag - yup, retrieved from a vehicle. Long, unnecessary story, but it was cool to see - and quite educational for the kids. :)

I got to thinking, in the midst of the beauty, the noise and the friendship, about what freedom really is. Galatians 5:1 says, "It is for freedom that Christ has set you free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." I think true freedom, and the perception of freedom are often mistaken in our lives. The street may seem like freedom to my little Draes, until he becomes burdened by the yoke of injury... or worse. Endless supplies of candy seem like freedom to my four-year-old, until he's burdened by the yoke of stomach pain or tooth decay. So many things can seem like freedom: anger, stubbornness, arrogance, self-righteousness, substance abuse, gossip... Until we realize they've strapped us with their yokes: guilt, broken relationships, loneliness, self-loathing, addiction, insecurity... 

So what is freedom? I think we have to be careful in what WE define as free. Look at that passage again... "It is for freedom that CHRIST has set you free..." In the context, Paul is referring to living under grace and not the law. But I think the key lies in who sets us free. Because of our nature, we often struggle to truly understand what freedom is - as noted earlier. Only Christ can truly make us free - and in order to remain free, we have to "stand firm" and, I believe, continue to run to the source of that freedom, or risk being caught in the crossfire of reality and perception (a hazy line sometimes, I know). 

Recently, God is calling me to some tough things - mostly things that require me to trust Him more and rely less on my expectations of people to make right choices. It's tough for me because I'm a big "justice for the masses" girl: always cheering the underdog, always trying to even the playing field. But God is calling me to let Him do those things - His job anyway - but BOY I feel incarcerated! And yet, He is the author of freedom, so I have to believe that it is for FREEDOM He has set me FREE. If we can do that (Oh Lord, help me!) I think we get to experience true peace and joy. If not, we often end up building prisons with our own 2 hands. 

I don't know what your yokes might be, but I'm believing Christ set us free so we could be free. Wanna walk with me? Let's lay down the bars we think are protecting us and let Him show us true freedom? Hee hee - then maybe we'll have our own little fireworks display!

Dreas turns ONE!

June 21st was Draes's first birthday! He didn't really get why all the attention was on him, but he definitely loved the cake! We wish you all could have been here to share it with him. We can hardly believe he's already a year, but he's definitely on the go. 

He's walking everywhere, jabbering all the time, and making his general presence and preferences known. This last year has been an amazing blessing, having Draes in our lives. We can't wait to see what then next year holds for him :)

For more pictures, check out my facebook account :)

One Step at a Time

New things can be overwhelming. 

Having your first child, for instance. Or for that matter, having your first second and your first third child, and so on :) Any "first time" situation can be scary... even terrifying.

Some see a challenge. Others, like me, see the insurmountable. I've wasted hours and hours pondering the mysteries of why my natural bent is fear when it could be faith (like my amazing husband's view). 

Recently there have been so many new things: New town, new people, new baby on the way, new house, new rules, new church, new everything that comes with planting a church... I began to find myself lying awake at night, unable to shake the fear of "all that must be done." 

Then a funny thing happened. My baby started walking. Not funny, ha ha. Funny in that God used it for ME.  I was lying awake... AGAIN... probably about 3:30 am, thinking, "How? How can I possibly juggle all of this? What if I drop everything and make a fool of myself and everyone else?" And God brought to my mind a recent picture of my son and I. A vision of my little boy, barely confident in his steps, reaching for my hand. As he held on to me, not only did he gain confidence, he began to move forward... one... step... at... a time. 

The tears came with the tender voice of God, "Hold on to Me, and take one step at a time."

I love the story of Peter walking on the water (Matthew 14:22-36). "...Then Peter got out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, 'Lord, save me!' Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. 'You of little faith,' he said, 'why did you doubt?' " (vs. 29b-31). There are so many angles from which to see this story, but I love it because it shows me Peter's humanity and Christ's divinity. Peter was afraid; he needed a Savior. Christ was disappointed, but he did not withhold his mercy, his hand.

It's so easy to become distracted by the wind, the voice of the enemy twirling us into confusion. But if we can stop, if we can lock into the gaze of the One who commands the universe... If we can reach for his hand, we can make it... one... step... at a time, until we're walking strong and tall, maybe even running! And if you feel like you're creeping right now, you can come on over into my lane; you'll be in good company :) We'll get stronger and faster every day, reaching for Jesus.

Oh... and I just loved the picture of Jesus learning to walk :) Guess it means He's been there too. :)