The River and the Chainsaw

I love the Bible. Every time I read it, I discover a new secret about God and His heart for His creation that had previously eluded me.

So it follows that I get ridiculously excited to share and process God's Word with my kids. This week we have been memorizing and discussing Ephesians 4:29, "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." 

I learned this year that the impulse section of our brains ("fight or flight," "my way or the highway," etc) is fully developed by age TWO. Our frontal cortex, however, (the impulse-managing-rational-choice-making-is-this-a-good-idea section) can reach full development as late as TWENTY-FIVE!! 
Thus, while I'm not so idealistic as to believe it will be a fully-functional strategy with my kiddos for some time we do want them to have the practical foundation. So we memorize and discuss. And - as is common - they blow my mind. 

Dezdin: "So, when we use kind words, we're kind of like the river that runs along the roots. But when we use hurtful words we're like the chainsaw."

There had been no discussion of trees up to that point, but all at once our little six-year-old had painted a powerful picture of the effect words have. And I was convicted. My thoughts had been on the external - keeping focus on using light words and not heavy. Dez, though, cut straight to the truth of the matter - how our words impact the soul. If the heart of our words is to build others up, we are like the river that refreshes and nourishes the roots of the tree and brings growth. If, however, the heart of our words is pride and selfish gain (being wise in our own eyes, putting others in their place, etc), we become the chainsaw that cuts them off at the stump. Can they grow back? Yes. But it can take years to recover from a comment that levels the soul. Have you found that to be true?

I turned the focus of our thinking from, "What words are we saying?" to "What are my words DO-ing?" As we get loaded in the car, walk through the grocery store, get ready for bed, clean up the table and on and on and on - am I the river or am I the chainsaw? Oh, Jesus, let me be the river!

Spirit, put a guard on our mouths, that we can love in word and action. That the fruit of our lips is truth in love and grace in all. Let us nourish the seed You have planted, and may the heart of our words be love!

Postscript: Today some harsh words were begin exchanged...
mom: "Hey bud, that tone is kind of rough."
brother 1: "I'm sorry I chainsawed you. You're a really great brother."
brother 2: "I'm sorry I chainsawed you too. You're a really great brother."
Then they commenced dancing around the room like growing trees. I love how God waters the seeds He's planting!